Weeks ago we signed up ourselves AND the kids to run the Gasparilla 5K this Saturday. Our son expressed a desire to earn an actual “metal medal” – not one of those (nice) rubberized “medallions” that they tend to give out to kids race finishers. So we thought it would be something exciting to do as a family. (Yeah – it will be exciting to try not to lose the kids in the crowd….I’m trying not to worry about how to keep them by our side for 3.1 miles….) Anyway – the need to run this week was all consuming…..cause I need to get the mileage under my feet.
Yet – at 1pm on Sunday, my dreams of running on Monday morning went up in smoke when I took my son’s temperature. A temp of 100 degrees plus the sore throat is a well known sign of strep in our house…strep germs seem to love our kids….I do not return such affection to the strep germs.
So I thought – maybe I can squeeze in a quick run to school with daughter while hubby watched son before going to work.
- Which would have been possible had I not discovered fleas on the (*&#$(& cat on Sunday night.
- Which meant I had to plan to spend time on Monday killing fleas and itching myself…
- Which meant that my run became a car dash to school to then get to Walmart to get flea killing equipment…
- Which commenced with me wrangling the cat and sequestering her in the bathroom…
- Which resulted in me being covered in cat hair…
- Which reminded me that I’d be doing mounds of laundry all day…
- Which I chose to ignore while I read the directions on the spray bottle for killing fleas on furniture…
- Which meant that poor sick kid and I moved furniture in the living room to maximize spray coverage for the cat’s favorite spots…
- Which prompted a call to a friend about the spray….
- Which meant I started spraying while talking to friend and quickly realized that the smell was overwhelming…
- Which meant I hung up phone and yelled at poor sick kid to throw on clothes and get outside…
- Which meant I went crazy and sprayed every spot I could think of….
- Which meant I was trying not to vomit….
- Which I succeed at while I gathered purse and homework for sick kid…
- Which resulted in poor sick kid and I driving off to McDonald’s in an attempt to avoid the fumes….
- Which meant a rather fun hour or so of eating in the car (remember the cat hair clothes?) and doing vocab and multiplication tables…
- Which I could not stretch out all day….as I had to get back to the darn fleas…
- Which were still on the cat when we got home…
- Which prompted me to start the bath of the cat who hates baths….
- Which meant poor sick kid was on “cat-catcher” duty at the door of the bathroom….
- Which was unnecessary cause she was too miserable to jump…
- Which was not true of the fleas who still jumped….
- Which meant I remembered that I forgot a flea comb….
- Which meant I called friend again and asked her to bring one to the door….
- Which poor sick kid got from her as I was still holding the cat….
- Which surprised me that she endured about 1/2 hour of combing (and drowning of fleas)…
- Which lasted too long and I realized I needed to go fetch daughter at school…
- Which prompted me to leave cat in bathroom while I made poor sick kid strip his clothes and go change and then I threw my clothes in the laundry room with his….
- Which then lead to a quick dash to the shower for me….
- At which time I saw a flea jump in my bra…
- Which made me scream…..and scratch myself even more than I already was….
- Which made my son run scurrying for the spray bottle….
- Which he finally found…..and I used to spray my bathroom….
- Which meant I was choking on the smell….
- Which meant I sent son outside to car while I just figured I’d spray my whole room again….
- Which meant I took my time getting home with daughter as I knew we had to wait for spray to dissipate…
- Which meant it was a while before I got back to the bathroom to check on pissed-off cat….
- Which meant that when I finally opened the bathroom to let her out….all of the $&(*#@(&* flying ants (which I know are not termites) had come back in our bathroom….
- Which freaked me out…
- And eventually led to me crying hysterically on my husband’s shoulder when he came home….
- Which reminded me that we have two other fur balls in the house (yes the rats)…
- Which meant that we tried to flea comb the rats at 9 pm….
- Which meant that I was totally justified in collapsing at 9:15pm….and arguing that if the fish get any medical problems – I’m just going to flush the whole lot of them and be done with it….
- Which means I’m totally going to suggest we rid ourselves of pets and only get taxidermied animals like The Bloggess does….
- And THAT is my excuse for why I didn’t run on Monday……what’s yours????


